When a life coach meets a client for the first time they must actively listen to the client to establish what their needs are.
To jump the gun and rattle off what you think their goals should be and how you think they can obtain them…is job suicide. You might as well say goodbye, walk out the door and think about another career!
A good life coach focuses on drawing information out of the client. To do this you need to approach the client in a non-threatening, relaxed manner and use concise open ended questions. Professionalism will gain trust – know your stuff! But don’t use terminology that will not be familiar to the client. Treat the client like he/she is the only client you have. Nurture their responses, encourage elaboration, never sneer, laugh or make snide comments. Even if you’re joking…it can be misinterpreted. You need to extract information from the client in a non-direct and non-judgemental way.
Once you have the information you need to set about analysing it together. Look at what you have and start to ask more specific questions. Find out what the client values i.e. family life, being fit, earning a decent salary etc. The next job is to translate his values into specific goals.
Encourage the client to come up with goals to solve the problem or fulfil the need. Put questions to them. Get them to think about what they can do, what time they can dedicate to it and in what time frame they can achieve it. If for instance, your client needs help with his/her business finances, you need to determine if he has the skills and time to maintain the book work; if he needs to do a course on bookkeeping or if it would be more economical to enlist the help of a bookkeeper.
An effective life coach listens intently to the client, prompts the client to assist in the analysis and planning of a strategy and keeps the client focused on the issues at all times. It is the client who needs to arrive at the areas of their life that they wish to alter. Once they have decided, the coach can then help them to draw up their targets.
COMMUNICATION SKILLS
When a life coach meets a client for the first time they must actively listen to the client to establish what their needs are. To jump the gun and rattle off what you think their goals should be and how you think they can obtain them is not only poor coaching practice, it is also job suicide. You might as well say goodbye, walk out the door and think about another career!
A good life coach focuses on drawing information out of the client. To do this you need to approach the client in a non-threatening, relaxed manner and use concise open ended questions. Professionalism will gain trust – know your stuff! But don’t use terminology that will not be familiar to the client. Treat the client like he/she is the only client you have. Nurture their responses, encourage elaboration, never sneer, laugh or make snide comments, even if you are joking…it can be misinterpreted.
Once you have the information you need, set about analysing it together. Ask specific (open and closed) questions to discover what the client values ie: family life, being fit, earning a decent salary etc. The next job is to translate those values into specific goals.
Encourage the client to come up with strategies to solve problems or fulfil needs. Ask questions: encourage them to think about what they are able and willing to do, what time they can dedicate to it and in what time frame they can achieve it. For instance, if your client needs help with his/her business finances, help him or her determine what skills are needed or need to be developed and how much time is required to manage things like shopping or record keeping. Explore options with the client to help him or her decide whether outside assistance such as a bookkeeper or cleaning service is needed and appropriate. An effective life coach listens intently to the client, prompts the client to assist in the analysis and planning of a strategy and keeps the client focused on the issues at all times.
Understanding the Communication Process
There are many different ways of communicating with people, especially when taking on a life-coaching role. Many different people have many different learning styles, and all of these styles must be used both as a teaching method and to ensure reinforcement of the learning.
Communication channels include:
- source of the message
- encoding/interpreting
- The message itself
- transmission of the message
Body Language
The most common way of communicating is through oral communication, or speaking, yet only less than 10% of what a person actually says is retained. When a person is speaking, the listener is not only concentrating on what is being said, but also how it is being said. A break down of oral communication indicates that an oral message is 55% body language, 38% the WAY it is being said and 7% actual words spoken. So at all times, you must be aware of your body language and ensure that it supports or reinforces what you are saying. For instance, your body language does not reinforce your message if you are talking about being sincere, but you are looking distracted, or if you are advising a client about patience but your gestures are impatient when you listen to his or her many questions.
Body Language
The most common way of communicating is through oral communication, or speaking, yet only less than 10% of what a person actually says is retained. When a person is speaking, the listener is not only concentrating on what is being said, but also how it is being said. A break down of oral communication indicates that an oral message is 55% body language, 38% the WAY it is being said and 7% actual words spoken. So at all times, you must be aware of your body language and ensure that it supports or reinforces what you are saying. For instance, your body language does not reinforce your message if you are talking about being sincere, but you are looking distracted, or if you are advising a client about patience but your gestures are impatient when you listen to his or her many questions.
However, body language is often misunderstood as a universal code in which specific signals communicate specific messages.
This simplistic view leads to incorrect assumptions about a person’s frame of mind. One stereotypic assumption is that people who avoid eye contact are avoiding the truth or lack confidence. In many cultures, direct eye contact is considered intrusive or disrespectful, so a person avoiding contact may simply be showing respect. Another example is the gesture of rubbing the side of one’s nose, which is said to indicate untruthfulness, though the real message might be that the person has a cold, has eaten garlic and wants to cover the aroma, or has an itchy nose. The key to reading body language is to be aware of the three guides: clusters, context and culture.
Course extract from the Life Coaching Course by Health Academy Australia.
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